Tag Archives: children

Who’s got the power?!?

A game of tug of war

Have you ever watched a two year old who doesn’t want to be potty trained?  Well, I have and what I see is a great big power play.  Who has the power in this situation?  I can tell you that the parent certainly wants to have the power but do they really?

What makes the parent feel like they can “get” the child to potty train?  One reason is because the parent is, well, the parent, the adult.  They know that the child is capable of toilet training.  The parents have watched as little Suzie runs over to the corner and hides when she could have run to the bathroom.  Then Mom proceeds to take her to the diaper table and changes her all the while saying something like…”Now Suzie, next time you need to go potty tell Mommy and we’ll go in the big potty.  Anyway, you get the drift.

This is power at its height for the two year old.  The adult wants something and the child doesn’t want to give it to them.  If your child were older and this was, say, an ipod or a TV remote you could tell them that you wanted that item and if they didn’t give it to you there would be a punishment involved.  The child would then choose whether or not to take the consequence.  The power is all yours at this point.  You’re the parent and you know best.  The child either hands over the offending item or you take it and the child gets a punishment.  Either way you have won the battle.

But in the case of a two year old you aren’t going to win this battle.  And the reason you’re not going to win is because you have no power over the child’s body.  To poop or not to poop, that is the question.  And the child is the only one that has the answer.  They will be potty trained when they want and that’s the end of the discussion.  Oh, you can cajole them with a candy or a treat.  You can buy that cutsie toilet seat, read the latest book and watch a video.  But in the end it’s the child’s decision and theirs alone.

I wonder if that’s how God sees us.  We are His children and He has allowed us free will to choose what we want to do.  He has given us the Bible to guide us, Pastors to lead us and so many different signposts to help us along the way.  But still we choose  our own way.

In the case of the two year old we know that in the end that child WILL become potty trained.  But for right now, they have all the power.

In the end we know that God wins but right now we still have the “power”.  The question is, How will you use it?

Twitterpated

Twitter

Image via Wikipedia

Okay, so the first time I heard the word twitter was probably as a little girl when I watched the movie, Bambi.  You remember…Bambi, Flower and Thumper were watching all the animals fall in love in the spring and Flower and Thumper were becoming twitterpated because they saw some other animals like themselves and they fell in love.  Do you remember that Bambi was disgusted and didn’t want any part of it?

Well, when I first heard about Twitter I didn’t want any part of it because who really wanted to know my every movement.  But as I’ve gotten more and more “tech savvy”  I see where this is a good tool to have especially for the school.  I’m still not there for my personal use yet.  Not sure I’ll ever get there.  But Aloma Methodist ECLC is on Twitter.  We’ve become Twitterpated.

So, follow us on http://www.twitter.com/AlomaECLC

See you around Cyber Space!

Barbara

Take a risk!

Have you ever just sat and watched children.  It is very enlightening.  Now, don’t go doing this in an obvious way.  You may just be picked up by the police and have to explain yourself.  But if you can, try to observe children and pay attention to what they do and say.  Children are just like adults in that they want approval for the things they do.  But they aren’t born that way.  It has to be learned.  As parents and caregivers we have the incredible responsibility of teaching the children in our care how to behave and how to respond.  There are good ways and bad ways to do this.  I believe children should be taught to be respectful, to say good morning and to learn appropriate manners and they can be taught these things.  But then I also see children who can’t or won’t draw a picture or try to make a creation in the art center.  And I immediately know which children are taught what is right or wrong when using their creative minds.  Actually for children, there is no right or wrong about being creative.  If they want to draw a picture of a person and put the ear where the chin is or the eye where the nose is or use feathers when making a lion’s mane and yarn when creating a  bird, what’s wrong with that?  But you say, that’s not how you draw a face.  How will they learn where the nose and eyes go?  Well, I’m going to be blunt here, but as  a child grows if they don’t know where the eyes, nose and mouth are on a person then that child has bigger problems than drawing a picture.  Do you know any child over the age of 2 who can’t tell you where their eyes, nose and mouth is?  I don’t!!  And I work with children all day long.  It pains me to see a child try to draw and stop and look up to the adult in the room to see if what they are doing is “correct”.  What’s correct when you are using your creative mind?  No one told George Lucas that there isn’t really such a thing as a Wookie.   Or a space ship that can destroy a planet or a little tiny weird looking animal who trains people to become Jedi masters.  And what is a Jedi master anyway.  There isn’t such a thing.  But if the adults in George Lucas’ life had told him that he couldn’t create those things we wouldn’t have the wonderful Star Wars story in which we can lose ourselves in the fantasy world of space travel.  Allowing a child to be creative involves that child taking a risk to see if the adults he loves and trusts in his life will let him. So, teach your child how to be polite to others and how to greet people and the rights and wrongs of social interaction but let em loose to be the creative being that God made them.  They just may be the next George Lucas or the next Mother Theresa or Picaso.  The sky is the limit.

Barbara

Let’s Buck the Rules!

"Rules and Regulations...Threshing Commit...
Image via Wikipedia

We had a visit from the Fire Marshall today.  Our annual inspection.  Just to assure you, we passed.  But it got me to thinking about rules and regulations.  I know we have to have rules and regulations and there are many good reasons for having them.  But I also have experienced rules and regulations that inhibit or stifle things.  Let me give you an example.

One agency that we are accountable to requires handwashing all day long…when the children come through the door, before and after snack, before and after playing in the discovery table, before and after going to the playground, before and after they leave their classroom and go to chapel, etc.  And I could go on.  But if we followed all of the rules of handwashing the children would spend 1/2 of their day just washing their hands.  Because remember, we have to multiply that time for handwashing by the number of children in a class.  So ten children washing their hands at the same time is 10 to 15 mintutes every time.  So, you get my drift, right?  This rule is a rule that was meant to have the children develop cleanliness habits and instead has snowballed into something out of control.

So, when do rules and regulations become a strangle hold on our lives?  I think we all have to take a look and determine that for ourselves.  There are many rules that I have to uphold in the Preschool and have no choice but to follow or I might get a fine or be closed down.  But then again, there are rules and regulations that I have a choice to follow or not.  And I have to weigh those and decide whether the quality or our school is enhanced or hindered by those rules and regulations.  Are they helping the child?  Does choosing not to follow them compromise the safety of the children or the health of the children?  I have to excercise my judgement at those times.  When that happens I usually discuss it with one or 2 other people and then come to a decision about what our center will do.   I may do some research on it to make sure that my decision is based on good information.  And then I respectfully make a decision to not follow the rules.  Is that a bad thing, not following the rules?

I don’t think so.  People are not all alike.  Preschools are not all alike and to try to make us all conform to the same thing is, in my humble opinion, ludicrous.

So, there you have it.  My thoughts for the day.  Ponder on this for you and your family.  Or for you at your job or club or church.  Here at the Preschool we try to help the children learn to be creative and to be individuals and think for themselves.  Let’s not forget how to do this as we grow.  Ask questions, try something different, buck the rules.  But do your homework first and get wise counsel.  Then break the rules and celebrate freedom!!

Have a great day!